Mac OS X Tiger Destruction/Transcript

Alright, lemme hear that glorious oldschool-- YES! [laughter] It's a little old; 2000. You see, when Sonic started-- stopped using mushrooms, he went for foot instead, So he's got bad feet. I forgot how Soni looks, but I'll do my best. She has, like, spikes too, right? Alright. Shut up! Jesus, UGH! God, I can't stand it, even ironically. Uh, alright. You guys remember the-- Uh... the S Symbol? This thing? Hang on, I-- I don't remember how to draw it, but, you did, like, this, this, this, And I remember, in school, you went like... You guys remember the S? It's something like, Eh-geh, 'Cootop,'

Oh, gosh. Oh, man. "Malware?" YES, [manic laughter] YES, I THINK I WAN-- [manic laughter] YES, IT BEGINS! Ah, man. My poor computer. UkWORLD, heh--

[Uk] Well, hello there! I don't believe we've been properly introduced. I'm Ukriaria! [Joel] What is my name? How about... "Less Smiling?" [Uk] Nice to meet you, Less Smiling! Since this is the first time we have met, I'd like to tell you a little about myself. [Koe] That you should be f-' euthanized? [Uk] I am your friend and Ukriaria! I have the ability to learn from you. The more we browse, search, and travel the internet together, the smarter I'll become!

[Uk] Not that I'm not already smart! [Koe] How about you go in here, you smiley-f---?! "Cool toolbars."

Alright, so back in the day, I don't know why but we always used the spray tool way too f-' much. And my friend with no talent, he would always go to school, open up Paint and do this – I'm not even joking – he would literally go to every freaking computer i-in– in like the hall – we had a lot of computers in the hall – he would open it up on a computer, log in and do this. (Draws a crude butt with a sad face beside it in Painter II using the airbrush tool)

And I swear to god... our teacher said, (in a nasally voice) "WHO'S BEEN DRAWING BUTTS?!?" (normal voice) And I-I'm just like, I know who it is but I can't say it, because if I say I know who's been drawing butts, I'll ' get in trouble too. But I knew that he would just run across the hallways doing this stupid stuff.

Next stop? Ad World dot nl, to listen to the sounds of--

KOOP NU!

Duitse straatvechters!

Gratis Bootleg-piratenspellen!

Nee!

Oma de egel!

Grandma the hedgehog?

Oh, please not again--

G R A N D M A !