Fictional Cinema Snob episodes/Zoom! into a Musical Mystery

Transcript

 * The Snob: Apparently back in 2003, PBS made a film based on one of their shows... and the plot is about a ghost causing terrorism in Boston. What fun. This could have been the 2003 version of Hillary's America! And of course, it has to be from...
 * (The Samuel Goldwyn Films logo plays)
 * The Snob: Of course. Samuel Goldwyn. The makers of Saving Christmas and Super Size Me...they always seem to put out bad films.
 * (The PBS Kids Movies "Doink! Button" logo appears)
 * The Snob: How ironic. The film opens with two kids f***ing killing each other with a button. The only thing to make this better is to have them explode. That would set the tone for the film!
 * (Cut to the film's version of the Zoom intro)
 * Zoomers: Come on and Zoom, come on and Zoom, come on and Zoom, come on and Zoom, come on and Zoom, Zoom, Zoom-a, ZOOM!
 * (Cut back to the Snob)
 * The Snob: Great, I now know what happens if you stuck Sega's 90's ads in a blender with Hi-Tops and The Buttercream Gang.
 * (Cut to the Zoomers exiting their TV studio, and then the opening credits)
 * The Snob: The Zoomers are a group of New England kids who make their own TV show in a studio in Boston, or rather an abandoned Walmart. As for the people involved well, here we f***ing go! The opening working-at-jobs-action is so good that the credits are trying to block it! Wait a minute, "Music by Voodoo Highway Music & Post Inc."? The f*** are they, the music version of how AAV Creative Unit wrote most of Godfrey Ho's movies and how Postmill Factory edited Saving Christmas? And I'm surprised Roger from Trick or Treat wrote this, the plot gets similar to that film, just wait and see. And this was literally produced by the guy who helped make those IMAX educational movies. The film was directed by Gerald Casale, who also co-directed Sagwa: The Movie, of which I previously reviewed, and like I said there, is a member of Devo. And this film does not Whip It Good!
 * (Cut to the Zoomers going back to the studio from Jean Perron's martial arts class)
 * The Snob: The Zoomers are going back to their studio after spending a day at the martial arts class of Jean Perron, because Marcel Baguette would be too obvious! Jean is played by high-wire artist Philippe Petit, better known for his high wire walk between the World Trade Center towers.