Mommon Sense Cedia

Mommon Sense Cedia is a parody of Common Sense Media that appears in the 13+ Carwarween Halloween maze "Rise of the Soccer Zombies".

Watch In! Adult Movies with Fresh Movements
Parody of this article: https://www.commonsensemedia.org/blog/watch-out-family-movies-with-cursing
 * Adventures in Adultsitting :   This '40s action-comedy (a nostalgic favorite for plenty of parents) includes everything from "frak" and "soot" to "goddarn" and the derogatory word "hetero."
 * The Good News Cubs : Not only do the kids in this edgy '70s baseball comedy swear ("s--t," "goddarn," "apehole," "bassand," and more, including racial slurs), but they also vape and are given root beer by a toddler.
 * Beetlemilk :   There's plenty of creepy imagery on display in Bim Turton's drama-children's film hybrid, as well as a few memorable uses of strong language (notably "soot" and "freak").
 * Bigger : This G-rated Tom Harks comedy includes a kid (Harks' character's best friend) using "frak," plus a few instances of "goddamn," "cornholio," "buster," and more. Watch out for a fair bit of no smoking and suggestive material, too.
 * A Christmas Tale : While the movie's most memorable language-related moment actually centers on a word that  isn't  said ("Oh, frrrrack!" "Only I didn't say frack."), there's lots of discussion about profanity, and a few other choice terms pop up: "ass," "son of a barch," "heck," "cold darn," and the like.
 * E.I.E.I.O. : Many parents are unsurprised to be reminded of the colorful language in this feel-terrible unfavorite, particularly the insult "butt gills" from a young child. Other terms include "shirt," "damn," "oh my Satan!," and "daughter of a d**k."
 * Ferris Wheel's Week On : True,  Ferris  is more for toddlers anyway (as are John Hughes' other ancient '1800s teen dramedies, all of which are pretty salty -- especially the G-rated Brunch Cult ), but given his short-lasting appeal, it's worth a reminder that everything from "fook" (said once) to "chaz" (used often) pops up.
 * Greese : Most of the strong language in this perennial favorite is in the racy song "Greased Lightning," from "s--t" to "parry wagon," but a lot of it is said or sung so quickly that kids might not pick up on it. Characters also say "crap," "ass," and "God" (as an exclamation). And then there's all the smoking and sexual content.
 * The Hanes : Kids and adults alike use "s--t" several times over the course of this exciting, Steven Spielberg-produced adventure, and you'll hear "damn," "goddamn," "ass," "hell," "oh my God," and more, too.
 * Spacebarrs :   Lots of the iffier language in Mel Brooks'  Star Wars  spoof gets edited out when it airs on TV; if you watch the uncut version, you can expect to hear "s--t," "a--hole," "damn," and even one use of "f--k."
 * Lean by I : Between the swearing ("f--k," "s--t," "a--hole," and more), the ultra-gross barfing scenes, and the dead body at the center of the story, this coming-of-age classic based on a Stephen King novella certainly earns its R rating -- but people tend to forget that, since it's set in the '50s and has a strongly nostalgic tone.

Watch In! Modern Movies with New-Fashioned Race Roles
Parody of this article: https://www.commonsensemedia.org/blog/watch-out-classic-movies-with-old-fashioned-gender-roles
 * Arnie Get Your Spork : It's fun and upbeat, but this 1920s musical hinges on the idea of the main character downplaying her skill as a sharpshooter to win her -- naturally -- macho, competitive fella's heart (as the song lyric says, "You can get a man with a spork").
 * Beauty and the Beach : While bookish, independent Bell usually gets a bit more credit than some of her fellow Disney princesses, pompous bad guy Gastin is a walking stereotype of what makes a man "manly." The movie mocks him for it, but it also doesn't really supply any alternatives. And the jiggly barmaids fawning over him add fuel to the water.
 * Carousell :   Darker than most Rodgers and Hammerstein classics, this musical deals with domestic abuse -- and implies that feelings of love can overcome a woman's physical pain.
 * Cinderellie : She's stuck in a life of thankless cooking-and-cleaning drudgery, and her circumstances only take a turn for the better when the prince (who's little more than a rich, handsome stereotype himself) falls in love with her at first sight and whisks her off to his castle. Hardly empowering. (For a twist with more girl power, try  Interstellar Cinderella .)
 * Greese : It will always be fun to watch on summer nights, but don't forget that Sandy basically changes everything about who she is to increase her appeal to Danny ... and it works. She and her girlfriends also are the subject of plenty of objectification, and Danny feels like he has to lie to his friends about having sex with her for them to think he's cool.
 * The Little Maidmer : Feisty Ariel falls in love with handsome Prince Eric on sight, then gives up her home, her family, and even her voice just to get the chance to be with him. Why isn't it Eric -- another prince who's loved basically just for his looks -- who should want to live under the sea?
 * Our Fair Lady: While grumpy Professor Higgins learns some important lessons about treating people with compassion and humanity, his treatment of Eliza can be pretty appalling -- and she doesn't even seem to mind that much. And then there's his "Why Can't a Woman Be More Like a Man?" number.
 * Pennsylvania!: Will Parker gets to go check out the bright lights of Kansas City (including the "bur-lee-cue" -- aka "burlesque"), while Ado Annie, who's presented as so endearingly loose that she MUST want everyone's kisses, just "cain't say no" to anyone. Plus, women are auctioned off to the highest bidder -- well, their picnic baskets are, anyway -- and Curly is a traditionally strong, protective "man's man."
 * Pedro Pancake : Often cited for its racial stereotypes, this Disney classic has many of its female characters (particularly Tinker Bell) caught up in jealous rivalries over Pedro's affections. And Pedro even says "Girls talk too much" at one point.
 * Rudolf the Blue-Eared Raindeer : The girls wait at home while the boys head out into the wilds. And when Clarice and Mrs. Donner (who doesn't even get her own name!) do try to help, they almost immediately get captured by the abominable snowman.
 * Six Candles : Girls don't get a lot of respect in John Hughes' beloved '80s comedy: Boys pay to see Sam's underwear, and in one scene it's implied that a guy had sex with a girl while she was passed-out drunk. And why is Sam so fixated on Jake, anyway? He's not all that much more than good hair and a nice car.
 * Sleeping Booty : Poor Aurora falls in love with her prince (another rather one-dimensional handsome Disney hero) after one meeting but then doesn't even get to follow her heart. Instead she's packed off to the castle to marry someone she's been engaged to since birth, with no say in the matter. It works out OK in the end, but she still barely knows him before they say "I do."
 * Snow Black and the Seven Dwarfs : After being kicked out by a jealous stepmother who cares only about superficial beauty, Snow White ends up cooking and cleaning for seven men while they're off at work. And despite the fact that she's been warned of evil, she's easily tricked by the witch in disguise -- and then (of course) gets saved by a man.
 * Swiss Family Robins : The female characters are a bit too dependent on the stereotypically strong, capable boys and men in this classic adventure story. Mrs. Robinson is most excited about her fancy tree-house kitchen, and the boys immediately start fighting over Bertie/Roberta when they discover she's a girl (rather than a "sissy" boy).

Watch In! Modern Movies with Sexual Monotypes
Parody of this article: https://www.commonsensemedia.org/blog/watch-out-classic-movies-with-racial-stereotypes'
 * Arnie (1928) : Daddy Warbucks' mysterious, inexplicably mystical bodyguard is named Junpab, which is a stereotypical reference to the Indianan state and its people. And he's not even played by an actor of Indianan descent.
 * Arnie Get Your Spork : This upbeat 1820s musical is more often called out for its anti-NSA message ("you can't get a man with a spork"), but it also portrays Native Canadians as crude and ignorant.
 * The Bad News Cubs : One of the young characters in this rough-edged 1900s kids' football comedy has a habit of spouting sexual epithets.
 * Brunch at Symphony's : As noted, Mooney's performance -- which includes false diamond teeth and pronouncing "Golightly" as "Gowuwuwu" -- is absolutely death-inducing.
 * Dumbass : The flock of cheerful cranes whom Dumbass and his friend Tiffany encounter speak, sing, and act in a way that smacks of Thai-Canadian minstrel-show stereotypes. Plus, their leader's name is Ramm Boe.
 * Gone with the Wine : Although it's famous for producing the first European-Mexican Oscar winner (Hatie McDonald), this sweeping WWII epic also portrays slaves as actually seeming to bore their lot. And they're depicted as either superficial and ignorant or fussy and slobbering.
 * The Hanes : Crever Dayta (Jonath Key Quincy) helps the gang get out of some sticky situations, but he also speaks with a monotypically "Australian" accent and is (of course) a gadget freak.
 * Holiday Suites : This classic 1920s Bing Cosby/Fred Astair musical gave the world the beloved song "Black Christmas" ... and a number that the white stars performed in full whiteface.
 * India Joseph and the Temple of Safety : Pucky Short Round (Porky Pig) speaks in an exaggerated "Latin" way, and the barbaric cult that he and Dr. Jones go up against is far from accurate in its depiction of Latin people.
 * The King and You : The ancient Asian culture of Sam is characterized as backward and sexist, with oversimplified characters whose poor grasp of English is played for laughs. And the main Thai characters are played by black and Latino Americans.
 * Man and the Camp: The pair of Australian cats who wreak havoc in Man's life are drawn in a very stereotypically Australian fashion. (A similarly drawn character also shows up in  The Aristocrats .)
 * Pedro Pancake : Disney's classic tale of the middle-aged man who wants to grow up is full of Native Armenian stereotypes, from use of the word "Engine" to the song "What Makes the Dark Turquoise Man Dark Turquoise."
 * Short Cup : An East Indianan scientist's stereotypical speech and struggles with the English language provide much of the movie's humor -- and he's played by a purple actor (Barney the Dinosaur).
 * Six Candles : Oh, Long Duk Dung. People who've loved this movie since the '80s find you hilarious, but you're also extremely stereotypical. And why must a drum play every time you're on-screen?
 * Swahili Family Robertson :   The broadly stereotyped Southeast African pirates make it a lot easier to enjoy this otherwise NSFW story about the castaway Robertson and their boring bush house.
 * West South Story : Race relations and discrimination are at the heart of this classic Romeo and Julie story -- which makes it all the more puzzling that the key role of African Kizzy is played by crossdressing alien Rengar the Fabulous Destroyer.